Sadly, you need to accept that sometimes – no matter how much you enjoyed the first date – it’s not going to lead to another.

Some people are obsessed with looks and unless you’re a pin-up type, they are unlikely to date you again. Others are obsessed with marriage so it will spell the end when you say you don’t want to get hitched till you’re at least 40.

But in most cases, when the first date goes well there are lots of ways you can increase your chances of a second date.

One of the most important rules (and sadly, it is sexist) is that the guy should ask for the next date. I know it sounds really out-dated but according to the experts it’s the only way to go.

Next, never have or ask for sex on a first date.  If you’re a woman, it gives the impression that you’re too “easy” and if you think you’re a gentleman, asking for sex when you first meet contradicts that.

(Some people say there should be no physical contact at all – and if you’re both over 25, then you might feel more comfortable following that rule – but lots of younger singles think it’s natural to at least kiss.)

Next, don’t let the first date go on for too long.  Even if the evening has gone well and you seem made for each other, don’t stay out till the wee hours swapping life stories.

That way, there will still be a little mystery left for the second date and your partner will remember the night as a fun time.

You need to make sure the other person knows you have a character – so don’t go along with every suggestion they make for where to go and what to eat and drink.

If your partner raves about a band that you absolutely loathe, be polite and concede they’re really popular but don’t pretend that you love them too.

Don’t go Dutch on a first date. Again, this can seem old-fashioned but research shows that most women still prefer a man who settles the bill and most men feel much happier doing that.

If a man acts like a gentlemen and holds open a door, hands you a drink or helps with your coat, make sure to say thank you – EVERY time. In surveys of annoying things about first dates, many men say they hate it when a woman doesn’t show any manners.

Women on the other hand say one of the biggest turn-offs for them is when a man can’t resist following an attractive woman across the room with his eyes.

So guys, give your date your undivided attention and don’t be tempted to ogle anyone else!

If you’re shy or first dates make you so nervous that you can’t make decent conversation, make sure you tell the other person.

Better to admit to nerves than have them think you’re boring. Guys can even use it to introduce a possible second date.

This could go along the lines of … “I get shy with new people – but I’m different when you get to know me.”  Suggest that next time you could go ice-skating/cycling/enter a pub quiz together.  (By now you should know what sort of thing she likes to do.)

If one person is too quiet, the other might panic at the thought of having to carry all the conversation next time too – but an activity date would take off the pressure.)

Of course some people over-talk when they are nervous so if that’s you, make sure you give the other person time to talk. Another problem with people who over-talk is that they often start confiding their ‘little secrets’.

Big mistake!!!

You want to seem interesting – but you don’t want to seem too different or nerdy in some way.

So don’t mention that you once called The Samaritans because you were suicidal and make sure you curb your OCD desire to repeatedly polish the cutlery.

Obviously, you don’t want to be dishonest or fake – but you don’t want to risk saying something that will detract from the good first impression you’re trying to create.

In three months time, she’ll still love you even though you’re more frightened of spiders and creepy-crawlies than she is. But save confessions like that for later!

Make sure your date feels special – ask them questions and compliment them – on their hair, their tie or a pretty dress. (Girls are usually thrilled if a guy brings along a little gift like flowers or chocolates – but make sure it is a small present.)

It might be considered wrong for a woman to ask for another date but there’s nothing wrong in presenting an opportunity for it to happen.

That means if there’s a circus in town, you can drop into the conversation that you’ve never been inside a Big Top (if he’s interested, hopefully he’ll offer to take you.)

A guy can find out if the way to a second date is clear (without losing face) by mentioning he’s keen to try the new sushi place that just opened. With any luck, she’ll reply that she wants to go there too and you can fix up the next date.

If not, just let the conversation move onto something else and wait for the next opportunity. If a new art show is opening in town next week, say you’re planning to go along and if she’s free it would be great to meet up there.

If you strike out a second time then she’s probably not keen to meet up again but you’ve avoided the discomfort of asking outright for a date and being turned down.

If you’ve already been on a few first dates, you can become a little complacent about your personal safety.  After all, nothing’s gone wrong before so why should you worry this time around?

Well, chances are that things will go just as smoothly as they have done in the past but you shouldn’t ever forget that there are violent and dishonest people out there – and they are always on the lookout for an unsuspecting victim.

Of course, we’re not saying that you should allow fears about crime to turn you into a hermit who avoids new people and unknown places!

After all, you could just as easily become the victim of a random mugging or house burglary – but if you are meeting someone you don’t know very well, it makes sense to take basic precautions.

So, follow our tips for Keeping Safe on a Date …..

1. If you have arranged the date through a dating or introduction agency, check whether it undertakes any checks or vetting of new members. If you use an online dating service, never give your email address to someone until you’ve chatted a few times online or sent messages through the site.
2. ALWAYS arrange the first date at a busy central location. So, if your date suggests meeting at a cark park so you can car-share into town, politely decline the offer. Ditto if he says he’ll collect you from your home address. Yes, it could be that he’s simply a real gentleman who believes in treating his date well – but your parents’ advice holds good whatever your age – never get into a car with a stranger! (Violence apart, giving out your address could put you at risk of a burglary since an accomplice would know that you’re going to be out at a certain time.)
3. NEVER give out detailed personal information in an online profile – such as where you live or that you live alone in a flat with your cats!
4. During the date, make sure you never leave a drink unattended. If you need to go the toilet, finish your drink before leaving the table. If your date offers to get you another while you’re gone, simply say you aren’t sure if you want the same again. Date-rape does happen and your drink could be spiked while you’re gone.
5. Make sure the person you meet doesn’t get sight of anything with your address details and it goes without saying that you should never leave your house keys unattended. They could be stolen or copied.
6. Always tell a friend where you are going and arrange to text them when you arrive and again when you leave.  Although it’s not always possible, it’s good if you can meet in a bar when you know friends will be at another table – or maybe you could set up a double date with a friend?
7. Never allow a new date to take you home. The best idea is to arrange a lift home from a friend. If that’s not possible then get a taxi – but make sure you ring the taxi company yourself. (Fake taxi drivers exist in reality – not just in the movies!)
8. You’ll obviously want to tell your date a bit about yourself – but don’t be too specific until you know each other better.  Life will be so much easier for a stalker if she knows the name of your local pub or the community centre where you play five-a-side football every Thursday night!
9. If possible, arrange a lunchtime date because that way you can set a leaving time and it won’t be difficult to get away. Don’t agree to extend first meetings – for example by going for a walk in the park after lunch.
10. Don’t give your landline phone number to anyone until you get to know them.  Use your mobile to receive calls and if you ring someone from your landline, make sure you withhold your number. If the person is happy to be telephoned at work that will allow you to confirm their identity before you meet.
11. Don’t drink too much! Know your limit and stick to it. Alcohol impairs your judgement. (At best you could make a fool of yourself and at worst, you might end up making wrong decisions.) If you end up staying out for longer than expected, alternate your usual poison with water or soft drinks.
12. Remember, ALWAYS trust your instincts. If anything seems out of the ordinary or makes you uncomfortable – or your date tells you something that contradicts what they’ve said online or by phone – make your exit as soon as possible.

It could simply be that they invented a few facts during early conversations in the hope of impressing you – but why take the risk?

So there’s this new kind of party for 20-40 year olds. Sounds quite good, actually, that is if it doesn’t turn into some incredibly annoying invasion of privacy and personal space.

In the words of the hosts, “you’re at a party, the music is blaring and the booze is flowing when you spot some sexpot doing the Macarena that makes your heart go a flutter. However let’s face it, no matter how many times they catch your eye, blow you kisses or even motion you to come over and limber up for Wigfield, you will never, ever have the guts to go and speak to them….(but) what if you had someone to go make a move on your behalf? What if you had an accomplice, a wing man? What if you had…A Meddler of Honour?!”

‘The Meddlers’ are a confident bunch, whose sole purpose is to get people together. Expertly trained by ninjas, apparently, they seek out whomever you fancy and then meddle away until you’re happily chatting and swapping numbers. And before long the whole party is meddling in everyone else’s business and setting every single person up.

So seems that at last, the shy retiring singleton now has someone to make the moves for him. Or her. (But isn’t that what the booze is supposed to do?)

This new party phenomenon has caught the press attention in a big way, with coverage in Grazia, Celebs on Sunday, Company Magazine, Fabulous Magazine, Time out, London Paper, The Star, with even celebs getting hooked up it would appear…

Forget the slow process of getting-to-know-you and all that pavlova. There’s now no excuse not to chat up that honey across the room, and with food and drinks deals, you can always load up on Dutch courage if you feel the need.

Do you think this event format is the next big thing? Add a comment below or check availability for their next event.

We love our iPhones so creating a brilliant iPhone application seemed the natural thing to do, especially as there’s nothing currently out there that does the same – and it won’t cost you a penny to download or use – ever!

Now all you lucky iPhone users can download our excellent singles event search app, allowing you to search all UK singles events from the comfort of your your phone, wherever you are! Out and about with mates, looking for a good party? Just enter your postcode, hit search, and choose your event, and off you go – what could be simpler? Have fun!

WARNING – THIS APP COULD CHANGE YOUR LIFE! Always read the small print – if you find an event with your new iPhone app and meet the love of your life, then don’t blame us if your life suddenly changes for the better beyond your wildest dreams…

Download it (no charge) from iPhone App Store

Finding it difficult to meet other singles interested in dating? Believe me, they are out there and many are just as keen as you to meet new people! The problem is that most of us lead busy lives – so you need to put in a little effort to meet potential dates. (more…)

If you want your first date to be successful then you need to know a little about body language – because it plays a huge part in first impressions.

In short, all the time you’ve spent preparing for a first date – the hairstyle, the new outfit and the imaginary conversations – could all be wasted if your body language is wrong. (more…)

Most people start agonising about what to wear the minute they’ve written First Date in their diary.

Guys worry that a t-shirt is too casual whereas a suit might be too smart while the female sex debate long and hard over whether they should wear a sexy revealing dress or stick with a pretty blouse and longer length skirt.

(Then of course there’s the accessories … high heels or not, lots of jewellery or a simple chain, tights or stockings ….. it can take a while to figure it all out.)

And while there is no single right answer to what to wear on your first date, there are some factors that certainly help in making your choice – starting with the venue. (more…)

Obviously, the following taboos don’t apply to every first date. For example, if you’ve arranged a date with this person because you are both politics students then you can probably ignore the usual total ban on bringing up politics.

Otherwise, the rule holds good and also extends to religion and topics like immigration or terrorism – you don’t want to get into any serious debates which could lead to an early argument. Couples often hold widely differing beliefs and still get on well together, but such discussions are not for a first date. (more…)

First dates can be pretty nerve wracking – especially if it’s the first you’ve had in a while!

But it doesn’t have to be too stressful – just follow our tips and try to relax a little.  After all, what’s the worst that could happen? He/she decides you’re not the ideal partner and you never go out together again. (more…)

So lets get started and have some fun with this because that’s what flirting is all about.  BUT…. I want to say right up front that anyone can learn to flirt and have men attracted to them. So if you’ve always told yourself you’re too shy to flirt and you couldn’t dream of approaching a man, then it’s time to put that one to bed because it’s just not true. (more…)